The Adoption Wait

When we started the adoption process back in November, we knew there would be a wait.  We knew it would likely be a year or more.  I kept telling myself that as soon as we made it through the home study approval, I'd feel better.  The wait wouldn't seem so difficult because we'd know that any day the call could come.

Saying that is a lot easier than living it.  And although time seems to be flying.  I mean, the boys' first birthday is right around the corner!!  But I'm anxious.  We all hear those stories of the crazy cases where someone knows someone and within a month or less, they have a baby.  I've heard them.  And even from people I knew before our adoption journey began.  Well, that makes my hopes soar.

But at the same time, I'm trying to be realistic.  We are being picky, and I know that means our wait will likely be a lot longer.  And within a year is probably very unrealistic.  But I hope.  Unlike the fertility journey, my hopes aren't dashed every month, but every time the phone rings from a number I don't know, I hope just a little.

Making the wait even harder is an adoption agency that seems to have collected our money and checked out.  When I changed jobs, I tried to contact them to let them know that I had new contact information.  It took nearly a month to get a response just acknowledging it was received.  Now, I'm not a PITA personality usually and though I complain to my hubby a lot, I often keep my frustrations with a business to myself (unless I get really frustrated), but I just felt so discouraged when they weren't responding (2 e-mails and 2 phone calls over the course of 3.5 weeks just to receive acknowledgement that they had filed my new contact info).  It made me question if they are even still working for us or if now that they have our money, they don't care.

I'm encouraged to find out that many have felt this way with other agencies, but that doesn't make the waiting suck any less.  And ultimately, I think that things will happen when they are meant to, but it's still hard waiting.  I fill up my free time in the hopes that maybe when I'm least thinking about it, the call will come.  That's the hope I'm trying to carry with me right now.  One day, one step at a time.  All I know is that I can't wait to hold my son or daughter in my arms, however he or she joins our family.